Lemonade for Heidi and Bo and Laurits

The Lemonade is given to someone special and dear, who takes the sour and bitter in life and adds sugar - turning it into lemonade - against all odds (as Betsy has taught me).

I am passing on this blogger acknowledgement to my dear friend, H, who was pregnant - for 3 weeks..but the "door" didn't open this time.

Only 7 days ago, I celebrated the new little seed with her and her husbond, we had dinner, laughing, joking and I always just loves their company. I left their place with a warmth and happiness in me for them, yet, feeling how fragile the moment is.. seeing the joy of being pregnant in her eyes and sensing how the fear was accompanying the joy.. the short reflex of holding-the-breath out of fear of being disappointed was also there.. and then yesterday after their first scanning, she sent me a message that there were no heartbeat in the little fetus..

No matter if you loose a child before or after birth, the mother and the father and the sisters and brothers and relatives do not forget..but I can only glimpse how a birth mother in Korea must feel on the birth day of the child that she can no longer hold, no longer comfort, no longer see the face of, no longer call by name, no longer give her love to

I only realized now with the intention of giving the Lemonade blogger acknowledgment to H, how she has been supporting part of my growth and understanding of being an adoptee with a mother - and yet with an invisible mother. A mother who was there even though I cannot see her or touch her.. she was there.. and I was there with her!
It takes courage to speak up on things we cannot see..

Just as Laurits was there with H and now no longer is.. just like the second child was there..and now no longer is.. but H has always shown me the courage to speak up on things that we cannot see, but that doesn't mean that they don't exist..

A quote from my friend Lise's FB profile:

"And the people who were dancing were thought to be insane by those who couldn't hear the music"